Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

Brief Updates

Friday, June 25th, 2010

Greetings friends, on the very exciting occasion of our first Monsoon season storm, a lovely little thundershower that awakened every molecule of the canyon into its own featured brilliance.  Last night I was up until after midnight helping friends get a huge truck out of the canyon… one that wasn’t running, requiring pushing with the jeep, pulling, winching and roping.  That adventure was preceded by an afternoon of moving rocks to make new border around a jeep trail to the kitchen for grocery deliveries.  I must truly be spending too much time on the laptop, judging by how much my legs hurt today.  Thanks to the great responses and comments to my post on the Kane piece and herbal conformism, appreciated each.  Please continue reposting it wherever you can.  Thank you also to all of you offering to help put conference posters up, that is a huge help.  I will get some in the mail including a signed one, and personally respond as soon as I get a chance.  No staff means I am the poster packager too.  Hugely busy with media outreach, article writing, and conference efforts, but wanting a moment to write others of you as well… Phil, it will be soon.  David, Angel, everyone… my thoughts are with you even as I give myself to this herculean work of love.  Tomorrow Resolute arrives, our sponsor, ally and friend, welcome back owl woman!  Now time for a break out in the post rain sweetness, just as the sun goes down.

-Wolf

“It’s Good to Be Me!” – by Amy Wardlow

Monday, December 14th, 2009

For the past year we have been receiving monthly donations from a huge hearted woman named Amy, who makes handcrafted body care products in Texas.  She continued making small contributions even after we canceled the Animá membership program and set the Supporter minimum at $50 a month, another person like Philip Dahl (see earlier profile) who insists on giving even though they have little to give.  I determined to profile her generosity here, and asked for a photo of her even though I’d noticed she didn’t have any pictures of herself on her Harley’s Delight website and used her daughter as the public face of their enterprise.  Sensing the degree to which this indicated longstanding self-doubt and self-criticism more than simple shyness, I persisted and got the following very inspiring letter back.  We share it here with her courageous permission, as the start of what we hope will be a continuous opening up and coming out… complete with the photo she was afraid to send, doctored by myself to emphasize this woman’s magic and wonderThis is her tale, and for many of you it is your story too.  -JWH

Amy Wardlow- Good to be Me

“You did not make me self-conscious, I was already there.  Truthfully, I started hiding from cameras quite some time ago.   You see, I lost myself.  I know the day it all began and how it happened.  I spent years hiding locked inside myself, protecting myself from the eyes and criticisms of the people who now called themselves my family.  I did it mainly to keep the peace.  It was easier to go along to get along, but what a price I’ve paid.  It made me very unhappy, self-conscious, and closed off.   It is a long story and I’ve tried to put it to paper several times and it just doesn’t come out with any coherence.  Maybe someday I will be able to articulate clearly.  But the simple fact is that when I saw a picture of me the eyes were filled with regret and resentment and I didn’t like it.  So I simply didn’t allow anyone to take pictures of me.

“I found the Animá website while searching through links on another website.  I’m not really sure what made me click on the link, but I did.  I read EVERYTHING, every word, on the website and then went to the blog and read everything on there.   The words from you, Loba and Kiva really spoke to me. It was as though you were talking directly to me.  As though you knew who I really was and that I was hiding.  I could see the truths that I already knew but had been denying for so long.  Those writings told me it was okay to be me and that I didn’t have to go along to get along.  That I didn’t have to pretend to be happy living life by someone else’s rules and values or let someone else tear me down just to build themselves up.  They told me that I was worthy, that it was okay to take care of me and my happiness.  That I didn’t have to pretend that all those things that I was being told I wanted were important to me, because they weren’t, and that while caring for and helping others is definitely part of who I am, I don’t have to sacrifice my happiness and my self-worth in the process.

“I admit I’m a bit scared.  I’ve lived this charade for so long that I’m afraid I’ve forgotten how to be free, to be happy, to be me.  Change is never easy, but I suspect it isn’t supposed to be.  I am a work in progress.  I still have people around me who try to throw obstacles in my way, fill my home with angry energy, try to guilt me into living the life that they want me to live.  I do my best to be gentle but firm in letting them know that I now answer to know one but myself and that I would not be being true to myself if I let them control me.  They are free to live as they see fit, but I cannot live in a situation that requires that I be someone or something that I am not just to please others.

“I have no idea if any of that made any sense, but it is a start.  I have attached a photo of me.  Not one that I am particularly pleased with, but again, it is a start.  I will be finding myself in front of the camera more often from now on.  You see, I look at pictures of Loba and her eyes are filled with the most unadulterated love, happiness, confidence and peace.  When I can once again look at a picture of me and see those same things, I will know that have truly shaken off the facade that I have been living behind and am truly letting my light shine again.”
-Blessings, Amy

(Amy doesn’t know it yet, but we are sending her the gift of an Animá self exploration and empowerment course, to use if and as she likes.  Please leave your supportive comments for her here… and share this post freely.  And to check out Amy’s soaps and other products, go to the Harley’s Delight Herbal Products Website)

Unconventional Supporter Profile: Steve & Val

Thursday, November 5th, 2009

Pledges of regular donations, regardless of the schedule or amount, are crucial to this place and work.  But besides the core financial benefactors present and past, Animá, this family and sanctuary have also had the unpredictable and unexpected assistance of a small number of entirely unconventional Supporters.  These have included Silver, who has talked about donating half of her garden harvest, self described redneck mechanic Ryan who has kept us in vehicles, and Marc and Diane who have helped keep those vehicles working as well as traded us deep cycle batteries for our solar systems and done more and odder favors than you can imagine.  Not all of these characters have been stereotypical nature lovers, healers, activists, empowered women and followers of the Red Road that Animá more typically attracts.

Blog-Steve&Wolf

Of these unique and wonder-hearted individuals, none is more loveably archaic, anachronistic, untamed and thus far untrammeled than our old compadre Steve Sale.  He is proof that you can’t stereotype folks, pigeon holing them into black and white categories.  Too often I hear my artist and conservationist friends dismiss everyone who disagrees with them as mindless wife abusers and Bambi killers, voicing as much prejudice (prejudgment) as a Limbaugh ditto-head lambasting longhaired tree huggers as effeminate communists.  Steve might not have the appearance of college grad extrapolators, but he can figure out and re-engineer nearly anything he lays eyes on, finds nearly everything in the world of interest, can’t stand a day where he doesn’t learn something new, and has an impeccable wit.  Imagine that he is anything like the norm, and you will be neglecting to take into account how he lives by an honor code worthy of Geronimo or Ghandi, adheres to core values like truth and loyalty in spite of being a part of a culture of delusion and lies, and respects the ways of spirit.  It was this, in fact, as much as his caring ways and unimpeachable honesty, that had me bonding with him when he was a fellow resident of this outlaw N.M. county.

Steve showed up down the river here for the first time a decade or so ago, after hearing only slightly exaggerated behavior about my lifestyle and comportment, the same stories that had kept plenty of local folks away had somehow served to call him in.  He felt like a brother long before helping with things I couldn’t fix or figure out, and donating wood timbers that still hold up the roof over our grounded-for-life school bus.  It was like the Jerry Jeff Walker song that Linda Ronstadt and others recorded, “Desperados Waiting for a Train,” except that neither of us had been much into waiting.  When he showed back up last month with his sweet earthy gal Val, I should have been surprised… but for some reason I wasn’t.  It was as if I had been expecting to roll up at any time, if just a mite longer than a reasonable person might expect.  Fortunately neither he, nor we, are ruled by reason.  Hence the glad reunion, in which I broke away from important tasks to revel in the reconnection.  Steve and Val don’t have to send checks to be Supporters as well as friends, supporting with not only love but gifts, showing up with needed and tasty food, shipping apples when he couldn’t visit with them, and then spending hours gathering fruits for Kiva’s medicinal elixer as our hand-picked-elderberry Supporters.

In the old days we might call someone you feel so familiar with a “kindred spirit,” no matter how many other ways they might be different.  Where we met, perceptually, was a place between solid projections, where the fields are always shifting and time has no say.  Indeed, when I think of Steve, a defining memory is of him walking with me on or near his land long ago, and how this mechanically inclined cowboy looking feller slowed to take in the sparkle of every crystal studded rock, let the talk fade away in order to take in the visage of the setting sun, then halted walking and speaking altogether in response to a sound or feeling that no progressive ecologist or new-age philosopher could have given any more more heed to, out of respect for something as subtle as it was plaintive, the implorings of the ancient ones atop whose long backfilled pithouses we then stopped to revel and rest.

“Did you hear that?”, he asked in a whisper, gesturing that he meant more than the incessant singing wind.  “Yes I do,” I told him, and that was enough said.

Retreat Feeback – by Becky

Friday, July 10th, 2009

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Note: Not everyone thinks of retreats as being life changing or even particularly challenging, given that a lovely cabin is provided and no instruction or assignments given.  The fact is, however, that many who come here for a retreat experience end up – intentionally or surprisingly – dealing with deep issues or reconnecting to themselves and earth in deep ways.  An excellent example was the recent visit by Becky, a sensitive, self-directed and grateful woman who did most of her work and play here by herself.  Her letter of thanks and sharing follows.  -JWH

Hi, Loba, Wolf and Kiva,

It’s hard to put into words what I experienced at Animá last week during my quest … but I want to start and give it a try.

First, thank you all from my heart for providing the environment, for being such good stewards of the wild, sacred place.

Loba, thank you for your helpful suggestions that always took me deeper than I would’ve thought to go on my own.  Thanks for helping me remember the power and delight of being barefoot, for your generosity of spirit and heart-filled support, and for the delicious meals filled with nourishment and loving intentions.

I realized that what I received at Animá was just what I needed:  a warm, welcoming, loving place to remind me I’m truly home here – here and everywhere.  I now have the deep, experiential knowledge that I am home.  Literally, I = home. I’ve been embraced by this place, I embrace my place here, I embrace my true self, me.

I also realized that I don’t “leave” anywhere – I keep my roots in each place, in each person I meet.  Visualizing my roots – a piece of me extending all over, the roots of everyone and everything extending all over – a marvelous web of connection and interconnection!  We are one in the sense of when someone or something moves, acts, grows or dies, the whole web is affected, we are each moved/impacted in some way.

During my time at Anima, I felt a full range of emotions.  Surprisingly to me, I mostly felt at home and peaceful with myself and my surroundings.  As I left, I felt such exhilaration and joy!  Then the day after I returned home, I experienced the pendulum of emotions swinging hard in the other direction.  Without knowing the “why” behind it, I just let myself curl up and cry.  I spent the day like a turtle with his head tucked in, with only the hard shell exterior exposed to the world.  I reminded myself that emotions are meant to flow, that the more I felt the true joy, the deeper I’d feel the sadness.  And, I was relieved to see that my sadness doesn’t last when I can express it and let it be.  I’d like to learn how to stay connected to others when I feel sad, instead of withdrawing into my shell.  Ahhh – more to explore!

I look forward to returning to Animá and seeing you again in the future.

My love and gratitude to you,
Becky

More Blog Reader Survey Responses

Thursday, January 22nd, 2009

Thanks again to everyone who filled out a Reader Survey, it was great to hear from you.  Two more have come in recently, that you may enjoy reading as we did.

To Christine and Yael: Having the impact on your lives that we do, makes all the work of sharing a delight.

————

YAEL

3. What is your work, path or purpose? I am a mother of many, three that I have given birth to. I am a healer and feel very drawn to the Medicine Woman. My purpose, this I am currently learning about. I earn an income as a preschool teacher. I love learning with and from the children.

4. How did you find this blog, and what causes you to keep reading (or stay subscribed)? I first read about you in Sage Woman, which I happened upon at the Barnes and Noble two issues ago. I was so drawn in by Kiva’s writings; I felt she was writing to and about me. I can’t seem to get enough, I just keep reading. I am going through the archives, I have read all of Rhiannon’s posts, I have read the history and I still keep reading.

5. How has this blog influenced how you think or act? I feel a deep peace since I have been reading. Strangely enough the writings made me uncomfortable at first, but still I kept on reading. I have been searching and searching all my life, for what I could not have verbalized to you. But I feel a peace amidst the pain and chaos. I am learning to open my eyes, I am learning that pain is not ‘bad’. I a learning that to heal another does not mean you have to heal yourself first. I am learning more to respect myself , the earth, and others. Can you describe any particular instances of something you read here affecting the quality, tenor, depth and meaning of your day to day life? There was a recent article I printed out on “Hard Choices…” It was very painful to read, but I felt I needed to print it out. There is something I must learn here…something that is calling to me deeply.

6. Are you a subscriber? Yes

7. Which of the categories do you enjoy posts from the most? So far I am working my way through the archives. Rhiannon’s writings were wonderful, and I could not stop reading about the history of the Center. I enjoy Kiva’s writings very much also.

8. What topics might you like to see written about from an Animá/nature perspective, that haven’t appeared here already? I really enjoy reading about the canyon and I love the pictures.

9. What else might you like to see more of here? I am hungry for it all, so at this point whatever you post, I am going to read. Anything else that you’d like to tell us? Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. I have been in such pain for so long and for the first time in a long time I feel like I am waking up.

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CHRISTINA

What is your work, path or purpose?  In the material world, I work at UNM’s School of Medicine, in the Human Patient Simulation lab.  I hang with manikins all day – it’s actually quite cool.  But that’s my income-work.  In my personal life, I’m an herbalist, a shamanic practitioner, and a Pipe Carrier in the Native American Tradition (Lakota, Cherokee, and Ojibwa).  My purpose, and the declared purpose of The Feathered Serpent Lodge (my teaching lodge here in Albuquerque), is the education and enlightenment of all peoples through intimate spiritual connection to the Mother Earth and honoring of the Sacred Feminine in each of us.

How did you find this blog, and what causes you to keep reading (or stay subscribed)?  I don’t remember how I found your blog/web site, but the exquisite posts I get from you – all of you – are what keep me coming back.

How has this blog influenced how you think or act?  Can you describe any particular instances of something you read here affecting the quality, tenor, depth and meaning of your day to day life?  Jesse’s posts on wild/wilding/re-wilding spoke to something very deep in me – I heard a psychic echo the first time I read one of his pieces – and I’ve been chewing on that subject ever since.  I’m an audial person, it’s all about how things sound (rather than look) for me, and it’s difficult for me sometimes to advance my thinking on a particular subject until I’ve found a hook to hang it all on.  Jesse’s writing often provides that hook.  I can only describe it as “nibbling around the edges of a subject” – the way you eat hot tomato soup, you know? taking little sips from around the outside of the bowl? – and then I’ll read something of his (and it’s not just him, really, you all do it in different ways) and suddenly I’m right in the hot middle and it’s all clear and I can proceed.

Are you a subscriber?  Yes.

Which of the categories do you enjoy posts from the most (see the Archives category list on the left side of this blog page)?  I’m interested in virtually everything you communicate – life in the Canyon is particularly appealing, and I LOVE the pictures.  You are living the life I began dreaming of for myself back in my 20s.

What topics might you like to see written about from an Animá/nature perspective, that haven’t appeared here already?  Nothing that I can think of.

What else might you like to see more of here?  Anything else that you’d like to tell us?  Just that I think you are grand, and have the greatest respect and admiration for you and what you’re doing “out there.”  I wish I could support you more regularly (I work at UNM, and you know what that means in terms of salary…), and I hope one day to visit in person.  “Seven rivers to cross…”

Animá Blog Reader Survey – your responses appreciated!

Friday, January 9th, 2009

snow-bone-sm.jpgHello on a SO lovely sunny Winter day, with the last of the snow quickly melting… it’s time to celebrate the second year of the Animá blog!  When we started posting we imagined that it was only for the close friends, students and supporters who we otherwise wouldn’t have time to write regularly about our work and lives.  It’s certainly filled that purpose, making it possible for us to share details that wouldn’t be possible without a blog, but it’s also surprised us by being subscribed to by people we have never met or talked to, who somehow share with us a sensibility or intent, and find inspiration and community here!  You’ve watched as we expanded to include posts of new and never before published essays, recipes from my cookbook in progress, Wolf’s latest artwork, inspirational tales from our 8 yr. old daughter Rhiannon, and all kinds of things!

It admittedly takes many hours each week to keep the posts coming, especially for Kiva and Wolf who do the bulk of it.  For this reason and others, we’d sure like your help in making this effort as relevant and helpful to you as possible by answering the following Blog Reader Survey that they wrote up for you.  Even if you are too busy or shy to leave comments here the rest of the year, we would LOVE to hear about you now, your preferences and your suggestions!!  You can answer all of the questions, or just focus on a few.  We sure do appreciate hearing from you, and will do all we can to give all we can!!

-Love, Loba

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Animá Blog Reader Survey

1. Your name
2. Email address (private, and optional)
3. What is your work, path or purpose?
4. How did you find this blog, and what causes you to keep reading (or stay subscribed)?
5. How has this blog influenced how you think or act?  Can you describe any particular instances of something you read here affecting the quality, tenor, depth and meaning of your day to day life?
6. Are you a subscriber?
7. Which of the categories do you enjoy posts from the most (see the Archives category list on the left side of this blog page)?
8. What topics might you like to see written about from an Animá/nature perspective, that haven’t appeared here already?
9. What else might you like to see more of here?  Anything else that you’d like to tell us?
10. Do we have your permission to excerpt from your responses, for printing on the blog (by first name only, without your address)?

Please post your responses by clicking on the Comments button, or else download, fill out and return via email the attached Blog Reader Survey document:

anima-blog-reader-survey.doc

Supporter Profile: The Morgans

Thursday, December 11th, 2008

nickdjangoportrait-sm.jpgThe Nick Morgan family have been Core Supporters, bedrock even, since the late 1980’s.  Nick and Sloane are tickled-pink parents and community organizers, with Nick an early Greenpeace firebrand and concert promoter for bands like String Cheese Incident… a dear and sweet component of the Animá family, community, Sanctuary and mission.  They live on the West Coast at the center of an intimate neighborhood and wide ranging circle of activists, artists, musicians and visionaries.  As seldom as we get to see them, it has felt great to be an Uncle to the outstanding boys Paris, Jeremy and the hard rockin’ little Django.  It was their loving need to give and be of service to the world that first made us feel okay about accepting the involvement and help of others in manifesting this vision.  And we still can’t do this by ourselves, without them, and without all of you.  Thank you from the core of our hearts, from this place and all those helped by what we offer.  There is never anything “extra” to give, but we join you in giving our all.

-W,L,K&R

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Supporter Profile: Lee Hurwit

Friday, November 21st, 2008

moononridge-sm.jpgWe’d like to take this opportunity to formally welcome Lee Hurwit as a core Animá Supporter, after years of surprising us with enexpected periodic donations.  Thank you, Lee, for your commitment to continue assistance, and letting us acknowledge and thank you here.

We first met Lee when he was freshly on his own, after having been a member of a close-knit community in Boulder.  He was unsure of what to do with his independence at that time, a result of not yet understanding his real gifts, needs and desires.  This explains why for so long, the greatest blessing we could be to him was simply to be “the first to see and value” him for who he really is.

It was only later that he wrote us about fully exploring our teachings and writings, realizing the significance of supporting this vital work as opposed to simply being generous to the people who recognize and care about him.  In the decade since, we have been witness to him create a business, take pride in his work skills, plumb his spiritual self, establish healthy boundaries, and seek ways of not just beautifully functioning but heartfully serving.

Lee’s sensitivity and vulnerability are in actuality his strengths… retaining the playfulness, curiosity, love and joy of a child as he embraces the responsibilities of what it means to be an aware adult in this world.

-Wolf & Family

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If you are inspired to become a needed Animá Supporter, at any financial level large or small, please download, fill out and return the Supporter Application: membersupporter-form.doc

  Thank you.  -Kiva Rose

Unconventional Supporters & Allies: Marc Rodgers

Sunday, November 9th, 2008

marc2.jpgNone of our supporters and allies are conventional in the sense of being average or uninteresting, but generally it would be easy to pick them out as the kind of people who might associate with us or seek us out, who would be likely to go out of their way to help this project out.  Highly driven seekers, at the cusp of a major change in their lives. Bird watching, river running, tree climbing eccentrics.  Activists seeking rest and replenishment, and herbalists deepening their understanding.  Nature loving Buddhists, Franciscan monks, and students of teachers like Thomas Merton and Thomas Berry.  Passion filled ecofeminists choosing to make a monthly cash tithe to further the work of Animá, and anachronistic old timer mountain men wanting to commit what they can out of their poke in order to further this old time way of living, and to protect this rare bit of unspoiled river canyon land.  There are others, however, that we might not have thought of as potential allies and friends, who miraculously appear in times of celebration or times of need.  This includes some rural conservatives who put “No Wolves” on the back bumpers of their trucks, but who refuse to take money for their garden produce, for welding a needed part or helping tow a broken rig for a guy they call “Wolf”.  The woman who works at the courthouse, who arranged for me to speak at the local school board meeting.  And now Marc and family, who first came into our lives by selling an offroad utilty vehicle meant for our use, and showing not only the highest degree of professional integrity, but also as much compassion and concern as we have seen in a man in awhile.

leafcamo1.jpgOur file with him was marked “7 river crossings” before he knew our names, but already he was going to extremes to get our original vehicle canyon-ready, adding a snorkel for deep water crossings, and now giant tires to handle the loose sand.  Finding out that we host retreats, he suggested a trade for weekends here.  The time was meant for rest, but the first trip he worked on the rig, and the second visit he and the mechanic he counts on showed up with 4 cords worth of fallen logs from a burn, spending their moring cutting them up to the exact size for Loba’s wood stove.  On the same trailer with the wood was a special lightweight vehicle, left in trade for our blue jeep which could have been hard to sell since it came to us with no title.  Not only did he ensure that we have a high mpg way to bring supplies into the Center until our other rig is ready, but he made sure we would love it by having it custom painted using real leaves and branches as stencils.  Even Kiva, who is generally set against internal combustion contraptions of every imaginable kind, couldn’t help but be won over by the patterns of plant foliage gracing its once garish fenders.  Last we spoke, he was researching solar powered freezers and no doubt scheming some way for it to happen for us.  We have been looking for every way possible to give back to him, as part of the great cycle of reciprocity.  Certainly the time here and Loba’s cooking, and whatever herbal or cooking instruction they and their employees might want.  A portrait of their daughter, wood carving if he has anything he can stand having butchered for the sake of art and the joy of giving.  Articles on their business, if they can work it out with any newspaper editors.  He never asked for counsel, as males seldom do, but I can still give a few insights to make compromising his needs and dreams even harder.  I’m not sure he knows “what to make of” all this, but we can’t help but believe that he knows he is helping more than an archaic backwoods family, that he is aiding not only a friend but also a way and a cause.  Here’s to Marc and Diane, unconventional supporters of the proudly unconventional Animá project.  My hat’s off to you… literally.  Wear it well pard.

Supporter Profile: Silver

Wednesday, October 29th, 2008

silver1-sm.jpgThe colorful, earnest and motivated Silver initiated her support of the Center by showing up with a home raised turkey and thoughtful homesteader gifts.  A down-to-earth woman long driven by a call to service, she had been searching for a project (or pack!) she could feel good about being involved with.  A bright eyed Silver explained how after a series of disappointments, she had finally found the “real deal” here in Animá.

“Real” is certainly how she has made her own life, learning how to be more self sufficient raising crops on land she restored with her own hands, starting her own businesses, and stirring the pot and spreading insight in her everyday world.

We, too, were excited to have found another kindred spirit, honoring the natural world, adhering to a code, and walking her talk.  When her marriage fell apart, she spent no time regretting, but instead used it as impetus for her move to the mountains of Southwest New Mexico.  She spends much of her time at home tending a garden that she generously shares with us, along with a passel of chickens and Reba the wolf.

Thank you Silver, for your friendship and monthly support, and especially for being an example of right living for any with the ability to see.

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